Green Acres is the Place to Be

You know, just when you think your marriage might be getting a bit stagnant, along comes a new form of communication which makes it fun again.

As you, my loyal readers know, Rob and I enjoy a similar sense of humor. In fact, we are the funniest people we know, humbly speaking of course.

I have never met, for instance, Dave Chappelle.

One of the funniest guy ever. And a really good actor too.

or Pee Wee Herman, my all time favorite funny...person.

But excluding the odd, in PeeWee's case, not yours Dave, I have to say...

We, Rob and I, are funny.

As I was saying, just when you think things are starting to get a little "stale" along comes a new, fun form of communicating that makes me giggle until I snort. Indelicate, yes, but I have to speak the truth.

So. First it was pagers, way back to college--no real use for them. But do you remember those commercials with some middle eastern guy proclaiming he was "The King of Beepers!" Too funny.

Then email, that was fun. IMing. Cell phones were cool. Texting is really fun but my new favorite thing to do with Rob is (it's a G rated blog, please!) facebook together. Sound weird? It is a riot

Last night Rob was at the dining room table with his laptop and I was no more than20 feet from him in the office using the comfy chair. He was working his farmville (obsessed, thank you very much) and I was just trying to interrupt his planting. I have a devilish streak that mostof you don't know. I keep it under wraps until the right opportunity strikes. Beware! ooohhhhh. Sounds scary. Not really.

So I started a chat session. And evertime I clicked my enter button, it would stop his farmer. What could be more funny than that? I will tell you NOTHING IS FUNNIER THAN HAVING HIM WONDER WHY HE CAN'T FINISH UP HIS PLOWING OR PLANTING.

Of course he figured out what I was doing, so we moved our conversation to our "wall", which to be honest, I still haven't figured out. Anywho. We started a marathon session of one of our favorite games: Movie quote conversations. The quotes can be from any movie, but they have to make sense in the conversation. Being a purist, I like to stay with one movie, but sometimes the mood strikes and you are off onto another movie. I know this isn't facinating to anyone but a few loyal readers, ok, Rob, but still.

So we did that for, oh about 50 times before he stumped me. I had no pithy comeback. I was speechless and told him so. He responded by asking which movie that was from and I answered all bravado.."It was all me!" Destined to be a classic. Maybe. Maybe not.

He may have won this round, but I will win the FarmWidow War!!

I will be his Eva Gabor to his Eddie Albert and we will have lovely times on our Green Acres.

For now.

The One About The Princess

FRIENDS

I want to tell you about my friend.

She just had a birthday not too long ago. This is my belated present to her. And to you-my faithful reader. Because she is one of the best people I know and I want you to love her too!

The Motto she lives by:
I met The Princess more than three years ago when I started working at the school. Since that time, we have come to realize that we are very similar--in our personalities, our senses of humor, raising kids and outlooks on life. We differ on one point though: I think the glass is half empty. She just thinks she hasn't finished drinking it yet.

She can make me laugh even

in my crankiest moods.

Case in point: (The following is a true and faithful account of a recent conversation--with VERY little embellishing.)

The Princess: "G !! Walk with me."

Me: "OK." (was there a choice?)

I follow her past SUPER BOSS'S desk which just happens to have THE cutest baby collage announcement in the world affixed to it. I am half listening the The Princess, nodding my head, but not really listening because I am so taken with that cute baby announcement.

Me: "I love that announcement!"

The Princess: "Yeah, whatever. I should make one of me."

Me: "WHAT?" and I commence a bark/laugh that people down the hall can hear. I am making a scene. And you don't want to create a scene at school, especially when the little darlings are still in their classrooms! OK, I'm getting off track. Back to the story.

The Princess: "You know, I should make one of those of me and send it out. For Christmas maybe."

Me: Laughing so hard words are unable to come forth to say something like, "NO!!!" I manage a feeble, "That would be funny."

The Princess: "It would be funny, but you know I was serious. I should send out pictures of me!"

I love this Princess. She is the best! She works really hard every day.

Some times she NEEDS a back rub to get her through her day. Doesn't everyone?? And believe me, you want her to get her massage or no one is happy. I love the days when she is wearing comfortable shoes...if you know what I mean!

The Princess works hard on her computer. She is such a good friend that she keeps up with their lives as often as possible. She is so good.

Have you ever heard of Facebook?

This is The Princess's little Prince. I am sure he feels VERY lucky to have his mom work at the school where he goes. No, really, he loves it.

R.E.A.L.L.Y. L.O.V.E.S. I.T.

Really.

On very rare occasions The Princess has been known to use her cell phone. The few times I have even seen her cell phone was for SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT--I think she broke a nail and needed it repaired. I was lucky to even get a photo of her elusive cell phone!

All kidding aside, my friend Alejandra makes going to work fun. She is the glue that holds things together. She is a larger than life character with a heart of gold. I can count on her, trust her and have even leaned on her at times. She is the best kind of friend. The unexpected friend.

So to you, dear friend, I wish you a very happy birthday and many more to come.

With much love and laughter from your ever faithful sidekick.

Will Somebody Stop the World? I Gotta Get Off!

Please, just for a while?



I found out something very interesting some weeks ago. It was when I found myself spinning and dizzy and falling over--into--let's not quibble-- stuff that I had a thought: "Hey, maybe I should go see the doctor."
You will not believe what he told me!! We exchanged niceties, pleasantries and then got down to business. I said, "Doc! I'm dizzy and I aint even a blonde! Am I terminal?" He sorta smiled and said, "well, little missey, let me take a look in your ears."


AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE FOUND IN MY EARS??? Limpy follicles. L I M P Y follicles.

Boy, doesn't that take the wind right outta your sails, eh?

Doc said he was sure that USUALLY my follicles are nice and straight and stand like a soldier...most of the time. Now they are L I M P Y. please dont tell anyone. What would people think? I mean limpy ear follicles could lead to the dreaded inappropriately loud laughter. You know it's just one hop, skip and one trip over for me and I am a ghost in this town. Doc says it's a phase. (We all know what that means!) (don't we? I might not...well anyway)

He uses a fancy schmancy phrase called...V E R T I G O. I though it was a movie, but he insists it is in my ear and I have one.


What do you think?? Do you think I should believe him? Whoops. I just fell off the chair. Sorry.

Ode to Blue

This is our trusty old truck Little Blue. He isn't very pretty on the outside or even on the inside but every time I need him, he always starts up quickly and takes me anywhere I need to go. He is content to sit on the sidelines of our life, waiting patiently until he is able to be of help. I hate to admit it.....but I love Little Blue. Don't tell Rob, ok?

I have been pushing for three years to sell Little Blue. Many a landscaper has left notes on the truck inquiring if Blue is for sale. I always yelled, "YES! He is for sale!!" But not Rob. Rob is completely attached and now I see why. Blue inspires loyalty. I drove him the past several days and really enjoyed our time together...except for the late afternoon drive home from a long day of school and softball practice: You remember: No air conditioning.
But, be that as it may, I have come to understand my husband's sweet attachment to Blue and now I am officially a Blue supporter for life. (disclaimer: please do not confuse my musings with any political leaning you may think I have...just needed to be clear)


This on the other hand, is our NEW addition. Let's just call him Bug. He arrived Saturday morning. Isn't he cute??



Well, from the other side he is cute, but this is the side that hit Michael. It isn't pretty. I am told it is fixable, but we wont' be doing it. We plan to sell it as soon as possible. I don't think our neighbors like the way it looks out on the street.

So...anyone need a broken car or an engine for their sandrail? Anyone?? Anyone??? Hello? That's what I thought too. I don't blame you.

At least I have Blue!

I love my country

May God continue to bless The United States of America.

This is my prayer today.

One down

Today was the first Benjamin Franklin Charter School junior high girls softball game of the season. We have some really talented girls on the team. Today they must have gotten nervous and were obviously flustered. We have no where to go but up. Way up! I know softball scores are not like baseball scored, but 16-3??? Come on girls! We can do MUCH better! I will take my camera to Thursday's game. Luke was with me today. He was such a good sport. Running back to the car for me. Carrying equipment. And while we were doing that, Nick was home with Rob doing things I had left him on a quite long chore list. He did every one of them! What good boys. Hey boys--You are lucky I don't pinch cheeks like my aunts!! Love you all for allowing me to do this.

Gotta Go Forward...Better Press On

Let's just recap Michael's first two weeks of school. Starting with the last fun thing and going back in time to the first fun thing, shall we?? Come along. You will love it!!

Last Thursday afternoon while in the process of making brownies--something he does at home to relieve stress--he burns his hand. Ouch! That's gotta hurt big college boy. Will you ever recover??

Last Wednesday afternoon Michael showed up at work--a name that shall heretofore never be mentioned again--and was told that he was on a two week suspension. Michael?? Suspended? Outrage! Evidently a "really good customer" came in while Michael was working a few weeks ago and wanted Michael to double punch her frequent shopper card or something. He only punched what was applicable (and fair). The customer wrote a letter to the regional manager and complained. Company policy states that he must be suspended two weeks before he can return. Well, you just lost THIS family's business. And another thing: Doesn't this woman have better things to do with her time that to harrass young people working at a food court? Sounds like she needs to get a life. (I'm not sounding bitter, am I?)

Last Tuesday Michael boards an ASU shuttle bus leaving ASU East (4 miles from our house) to head into Tempe for the day. At the end of his school day, he boards a bus heading back to ASU East....or so we thought. I mean, it was the same bus stop. Same type of bus. But as Michael is watching the world go by, he notices a familiar landmark: The Diamondbacks ballfield. Hmmm. That's in Phoenix. After a couple of quick texts to his Dad, Michael learns that he jumped on the ASU bus heading to 51st Avenue and Thunderbird. If you only could have heard me laughing! The bus driver, having seen the lost, dazed and confused look many times before I imagine, says the inevitable: "You got on the wrong bus. Don't worry. We will be back in Tempe in about 90 minutes." Ha. Again, laughing, me, hard. Rob and I took pity on him and drove into Tempe to pick him up (at 7pm ) for fear he might get on a bus heading to Mexico. (Just kidding!!!) Because he has a pretty good sense of humor, Michael laughed it off by saying, "at least I got some homework done. And Dad, can we stop at In N Out Burger? I haven't eaten all day?"

Which leads us to the beginning of his week. On the way to school Michael was involved in an car accident. He apparently went through a red light (he swears the light must have changed while he was in the intersection) and a nice young man didn't wait for him to clear the intersection before turning into the rear drivers side of the Honda Pilot. The car that hit Michael was an old VW bug. It is completely totaled. The Honda didn't fair as bad, but needs alot of work. Did I mention it was technically Michael's fault and that our insurance rates have already gone up?
Oh, on a serious note, no one was hurt and for that I am truly thankful.

Which brings me to: ME. If you see me in the next few weeks and I don't seem all that happy or zippy or smiley it's because I'm not. I'm going to be in a very bad mood for about 10 days or so. You see, I get to drive the truck: little blue (with no air conditioning) for the foreseeable future and since the weather is heating up again--108 by the end of the week, I can already sense that I should not be where other people will be.

But it could be worse. It could always be worse. So after all, I better press on.